The Internet Guide to Cows and Politics
1. Socialism: You have two cows, give one to your neighbor.
2. Communism: You have two cows. Give them to the government. Thegovernment gives you milk.
3. Fascism: You have two cows. Give the milk to the government.
4. Nazism: The government shoots you, takes the cows and feeds one to thearmy and the other to the police.
5. Capitalism: Slaughter the cows; compete with McDonalds.
6. Anarchism: Keep the cows. Steal a few more cows.
7. Conservativism: Milk the cows, enbalm the cows, freeze the milk, nukethe cows to keep from spreading the disease. Phase out over five years theamount of milk you’re required to give to the government.
8. Liberalism: Give the milk back to the cows. Let them escape. Put thecows on the Voter Registration list.
9. Libertarianism: Milk the cows and keep it for yourself; hope thepopulace can find milk elsewhere.
10. Militiaism: Shoot the government if they come for your cows.